Scorpio Season Reflection: How to Stop Giving Your Power Away to Others

Scorpio energy deserves our love for its deep healing potential and it’s ability to show us a crystal clear image of who we really are as well as who we can be. Scorpio is a zodiac archetype that’s characterized by words such as power, authenticity, and regeneration.

The phrase associated with Scorpio is “I desire”, which sums up the major themes of this archetype. In order to come to the point where we can articulate what we desire, we must be transparent (authentic) with ourselves. In order to achieve what we desire, we must believe that it is accessible which requires having some notion of personal power.

People with Scorpio placements generally pay heightened attention to the subtle aspects of relationships and situations. Scorpio, a feminine fixed sign ruled by Mars, is typically paying attention to how the (often unspoken) power dynamic is functioning in any given situation or relationship. They achieve this by paying attention to behaviors (no matter how subtle) to gain insight into other people’s state of mind as opposed to simply relying on what people have to say.

One thing working with energy teaches you is that energy is subtle. Perhaps this is why Scorpio has ancient associations with the magical arts. Just because you don’t feel energy or see energy doesn’t mean it’s not influencing a situation. The material realm moves way more slowly than energy does so if you wait for “proof” to show up, you will always be behind.

This is especially relevant when it comes to the idea of giving our personal power away to other people. Personal power is our ability to govern ourselves and live as energetically sovereign beings. We don’t always consciously feel when we are giving our power away, especially because so many of us have been conditioned to understand powerlessness as a “norm”. Mechanisms of giving our power away have been embedded into our society for centuries so it’s perfectly human to find ourselves in situations of self-imposed powerlessness.

Self awareness is important because even though we sometimes can’t feel ourselves giving our energy away (more subjective) we can still identify the behaviors associated with giving away our power (more objective). Being able to consciously identify these behaviors means we can in turn consciously make a decision about whether or not we want to continue or terminate that energetic pattern.

The Common Behaviors

Giving our power away typically manifests as an energetic imbalance, or a disparity between how much energy we are giving and how much energy we are receiving (from something or someone). Below we’ve listed some of the most common ways people give their power away to others.

Personal power is our ability to govern ourselves and live as energetically sovereign beings.

1. Letting People Put Us on a Pedestal

You ever wondered why old heads love mentioning God every time someone compliments them? They’ll get a compliment like “I love the renovation work you’ve done on the home, Doretta” and respond with something like “Yes, God is good! It took us 2 years.” That’s because it’s ancient knowledge that people are the most spiritually susceptible when in a space of non-humility and when they are disconnected from the Source of their power.

This idea shows up in some Latinx and Jewish communities as well, where you will hear parents tell their young to beware of bragging and publicizing personal accomplishments in order to evade mal de ojo or the evil eye.

Evil eyes only have power over us in instances where we are not connected to our Source of divine power, whatever we may call that force (God, Higher Self, Spirit Guides, etc); and the easiest way to disconnect someone from their source is to charge their ego and deceive them into thinking that it is their power alone that is responsible for the good things in their life.

This is because believing we are personally responsible for all we have accomplished requires us to deny and delegitimize the work & help of all the energies/forces that sustains us, a belief that renders us spiritually weak and defenseless to any energy being directed at us.

2. Using Social Media as a Tool of Passive Aggression

This type of scenario typically takes place after people get out of a relationship that ended with miscommunication. As an alternative to direct communication with the person who hurt them, the person may dedicate their social media presence to sending indirect, emotionally charged messages to the other person in the hopes of reconciliation or proving their point.

The reason this can be problematic is because every time we perform our emotions to elicit a certain response from someone & fail to receive that response, we are giving our power away. This is because performing our emotions for people requires sending our energy to them, since emotions are energy. When they don’t engage with that energy/emotion in the way that we expect them to, it creates an energetic imbalance in which we are giving energy away but not receiving any back in return.

This dynamic becomes even more dangerous when the internet gets involved because now the emotional performance isn’t only being seen by the target of the passive aggression, but by large audiences.

3. Manipulating with Sex

It is a common saying in spiritual communities that “sexual energy is the most potent form of energy”. This is because wherever there is sex happening, there is something being created. Sexual energy is the energy of creation. It flows in all things and everywhere in the world.

Given this information, it is wise to be aware of what we are creating from our sex. It is also important to be aware of whether our sex is a healthy exchange of sexual energy between us and the other person or something that’s depleting us of our energy.

Giving away our sexual energy to achieve outcomes or persuade people (manipulating with sex) is unhealthy for two major reasons: A) If sex is an event of creation and we are focused on manipulating our partner during sex that means we are creating/manifesting more of the energy of manipulation in our lives in general, and B) the energetic dynamic of manipulation relies on sending energy and muting the intensity of the other person’s energy, which will create an energetic imbalance where you are giving more energy than you’re receiving a.k.a. being energetically depleted.

That being said—and no condition is permanent. Awareness is the first step in making better choices.

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